Are you feeling stuck in midlife?

We have a local restaurant that we like to go to every once in a while. It’s small, with real character and the staff are lovely.

Whenever I go I order the same main course; a salmon salad (with extra vinaigrette). It is sublime. I am not even sure why, but I love it.

Now there are numerous other delicious dishes that I could try and yet I stick with the same one. Every time.

This reminded me of the work of Jim Rohn. Rohn spent his career talking about personal development, and I’d like to share one of his ideas.

Unless you change how you are, you will always have what you’ve got. Yes it really is that simple.

Your job, your confidence, your relationships and your energy don’t improve while you wait for them to. They stay where they are, because you’ve stayed where you are.

I know that you probably don’t want to hear that.

Most of us would love a better future to magically appear of its own accord.

But if you’re in midlife and wondering whether this is it, the likelihood is that the next five years will look a lot like the last five unless something about you changes first.

Feeling stuck in midlife?

Let’s take this a step further.

When we say we’re stuck, I don’t think that’s really what’s going on. I think we’re scared of what changing might cost us.

And it will cost you something because every change does.

There might be a financial impact, perhaps a dip in income while you retrain, a pay cut to move into an entirely different industry. There might be other costs too - that you feel internally. I’m not going to pretend otherwise.

But staying the same has a cost as well.

It’s more difficult to quantify, so we don’t pay any attention to it. But it’s another year on a salary that hasn’t moved, another year in a job that you loathe, another missed opportunity. Add those up and it’s often far more than the cost of changing.

You’re paying either way, so the real question is which cost you’d rather carry.

You may not have chosen where you are right now. Life hands us plenty we didn’t ask for. But you do get to choose whether you stay there.

Big difference.

Yes, it will feel uncomfortable

Change can feel unsettling - challenging - and I bet you’ve already felt some of that just reading this.

That unsettled feeling though, doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t try it. It’s simply what growth feels like. It is what comes from moving from where you are now to where you want to be.

Let me tell you though, it’s well worth it.

And don’t take my word for it. There are thousands that have made big changes in midlife and literally never looked back.

Far better than living with the regret of not trying, me thinks.

So instead of asking “Can I afford to change?”, consider “What is staying the same costing me?”

In fact, write the answer down in actual numbers if you can: years, money, energy, confidence. Then at least you can make an informed choice - the one that has the best outcome for you.

If you’d like some support with that, why don’t you book a Reset Hour with me and let’s see what a changed you could look like.